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The shame of consciousness
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Good Evening Family! I got called "one of those mothers" today by some of my peers. It was funny, not as insulting as they intended, and a little sad.
So this woman's sons father bought his son some shoes. Nice, colorful, name brand shoes. The little boy loved the shoes but his mother didn't like the shoes because they weren't current enough for her preferred style. The woman decided to take the shoes back and get some other shoes. Then other women in my age range weighed in. I didn't say anything because well because I thought it was a trivial issue mostly. Once I was asked my thoughts I said that I'm not the type of mother that would be so caught up in something so ridiculous. Then she asked for clarification. I then proceeded to say that the little boy was 2 and he got some thing from his father and that was most important. Our sons are dying in the streets over being fly more than being educated. We are teaching our children that their importance is in the their clothes not in their heads. I don't agree. Nike doesn't care about your seeds. If I was the father of that little boy I would take that as a sign that she wanted to raise him alone. Instead of co parenting she was being petty and materialistic and in turn forgot about what's best for her son. What's best is not that he's wearing 200 tennis shoes at 2 years old, what's best is that he sees his father providing for him and being active in his life. Then a woman said "Oh you're one of those mothers..." I looked and smiled and said yes I am. She said that she didn't want her son to look like anything. My rebuttal is he is a child and he will look like a child until he starts looking like a man, nowadays that's 12. Just 12 until he looks like a criminal in the eyes of systematic racism. I don't know about your son but I want my son to look like everything, everything that matters. I want him to look like black pride, dignity, education, and respect. There aren't any clothes that are going to do that. I want him to value his history and his future. So yeah I'm one of those moms. I wear that proudly. I would never want any child I bore to think that wearing clothes with white men names makes them somebody.
I not ashamed to be conscious. I won't lower the importance of knowing thyself in my home because of what's "fly". I don't entirely know what " one of those parents" means but i am sure that my children will be raised to make noise and pave the way. So when my child becomes something the world can't help but acknowledge as great I will be "one of those parents" and i'll be a proud one.
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